- I’m a Pisces… According to my New Age neighbour, I’m ‘artistic’ and ‘caring’. I could totally be that, as long as it involves her tits.
- I have more people queued up to be my “friend” on Facebook than I have Twitter followers. The difference? I would never stab any of you…
- The secret to a long-lasting marriage is mutual respect! You ignore her penis remarks and she doesn’t ask you about her dumb-ass outfits.
- I went to a costume party last night; as a ninja. No idea how I got home, why my ass is hurting, and why I’m wearing a cheerleader outfit.
