- Your will realize how pointless it is to measure your penis after you see a woman give birth to a baby the size of a Volkswagen Beetle.
- USA 6 – FINLAND 0, after the first period! They should have replaced Kiprusoff with a tampon at 3 – 0 in an attempt to stop the bleeding.
- WTF moment: The 27 secs it takes to realize that your new flat-screen TV isn’t broken, and it’s just the kids who left it on scrambled porn.
- “Hun, could you please not squeeze my tits like you are baking bread on an hourly wage?” What is that supposed to mean?
- Works when you are dating… but trust me: Do not surprise your wife with a rubber fist (unless she has lost an arm in a sword fight).
- Progress: Fireworks to space shuttles… Communal outhouses to Twitter…
- When I was a teenager in the 1980s, a dildo looked like a… you know, dildo… When did the Klingon weaponry-looking things happen?
- Insanely fat felines around here… I suspect that their main source of protein is the armpits of the hobo living in the bus shelter.
- Better than a cuddle: She grabs my ears, and demands that I scream in a crappy Scottish accent, while she rides me like an Ogress in heat.
- Tornado science: A high-pressure air mass (so-called trigger) is pulled down from the sky by a low-pressure area (so-called trailer park).
- Celebrate your boyfriend’s huge erections when they happen. Who knows? One day, you might just be the reason for one of them.
- OMG Facts: There are no rainbows in Russia because they hunted pixies to extinction for their scrumptious livers, in the early 1500s.
- If I was 100% sure that some of the hot lady-avatars I follow, doesn’t belong to dudes, I would tug at myself more often.
- Secrets: When I have the house for myself, I rub my ass with butter and slide around naked on the kitchen floor, squealing like a hobbit.
- True love: During a lap dance, he will call the stripper by your name when he gets the thong pulled over his head.
