- The best things in life are free: love… sex… seeing an uptight prick drop his iPad and squeal like a school girl.
- No, you stepped in cat poop, dragged it in to the house, didn’t notice until later, washed the floor and shoes, threw up and needed a nap.
- Tip! You can easily tell if he’s gay by the way he sneaks up behind you and plays with your nipples at the urinals.
- Oh, it’s not Friday to you? Move to Canada! Every day is Friday here. We also have beer.
