- I’m at the age now where I don’t risk getting it in my own eye, unless I hang upside down… and my wife spanks me with rhubarb.
- It’s early Sunday morning and the fail whale already splashed on my screen. Clear bandwidth – send aspiring rappers back to MySpace. Thanks!
- It’s not Monday morning, is it? Ok, hacking the HR voicemail system… Passwords to try first: ‘dumbass’, ‘justahangover’ and ‘sofiredlulz’.
- How does a dog determine when his balls are clean? Taste? Smell? The tongue and jaw went numb? Was hit with a shoe?
