2010 – June 25 (Back to star the jiffers out of you)

  • Backrub! It’s all I have in me. I’ll be back to star the jiffers out of you tomorrow. My wife has ordered me to bed – doctor’s orders. Yay!
  • I hate it when I’m drunk at a bar but smart enough not to speak and simply point to my groin, and I still get turned down. Stuck up bitches!
  • How to pick up women at Walmart: “That is one hot-ass garden gnome! I have Velveeta cheese… What are you doing tonight?”
  • There would be fewer daddies if during sex, the turnip yelled “Your life is changing in T-minus 3 seconds!” instead of “Go, big guy, go!”
This entry was posted in Tweets. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

* Copy This Password *

* Type Or Paste Password Here *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>