- Lying on the couch and eating cold cheese fondue with a spatula, and crying to Seinfeld reruns, is a poor substitute for sex.
- I wonder if the underwear bomber is back to masturbating yet?
- Spelling is twicky! Sorry.
- ‘Analysis of lust and constipation – VII attempt’: The Mona Lisa if painted today.
- Looking for a bootleg of Bruce Springsteen’s ‘High on love (even though his sack hangs low)’ a duet with Reba McEntire. Anyone?
- You know your penis is sub par at best when she looks more like an angry hippo than a clubbed seal pup afterwards.
- Marriage is where repeated untimely headaches eventually gets the garage door painted.
