- Hearing Chris De Burgh’s ‘Lady In Red’ always draws a tear to my eye when I have a hooker matching the description, in the trunk of my car.
- “Okay, let’s meet tomorrow at noon by the big tree where the elephants piss.” Nigerian scammers love that reply. Try it.
- Using my daughter’s quote, “Fucking 50 dollar lipstick” to draw nosebleeds on my son’s playmates, was not the best idea I ever had.
- Grade 5 math: ‘How many douche bags that couldn’t find another hobby do you find in a barbershop quartet? Explain in mathematical terms!’
