2011 – April 23 (How to get through Easter dinners)

  • How to get through Easter dinners… When talking to in-laws, imagine them on meth and lighting themselves on fire; best meals ever!
  • When in a “grunt-off” with a person in the bathroom stall next to you; try whale sounds, followed by Swahili tongue chanting for the win.
  • I asked a Ouija board who would win the Stanley Cup, and I got, “I F I N G E R Y O U R A S S W H E N Y O U S L E E P.” Ha! They don’t work!
This entry was posted in Tweets. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

* Copy This Password *

* Type Or Paste Password Here *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>