2011 – July 20 (Obviously paranoid delusions)

  • Obviously paranoid delusions… Sane people would not say, “I was anal-probed by aliens!” but “Last night, I was orbiting Earth, bro!”
  • I’m just a boy at the pool, standing in front of a girl, asking her to rub the excess sun block on her boobs all over my back, for 5 bucks.
  • I don’t know if it’s just me, but I don’t think Cameron Diaz is “all that” unless she has Ben Stiller’s cum in her hair.
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