2011 – March 10 (Wife reads your browser history)

  • It’s been awhile… What’s that sexual position called where your wife reads your browser history? She says, ‘Royally Fucked’. Not sure?
  • Sometimes I catch a whiff of this perfume… Hot! Would love to buy it for my wife. Don’t know the name… Smells like ex-girlfriend. Ideas?
  • Never call your dog and then scold him! Why would he crawl out from the hiding spot under the porch next time? Sorry, not ‘dog’ – husband.
  • Afternoon quickies are so much faster now with high-speed Internet connections.
  • Money saving tip! 5 gallons of lube is cheaper than chipping a tooth on her vibrator.
  • What kind of sick bakery puts bran and prunes in their damned chocolate muffins? Really? Have you ever heard of anything so fu… BRB.
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