- Heads-up! My guy in India will not star your tweet for me if a word contains more than four syllables. Thank you for your understanding.
- Amazing fact: If you took all Irish foreskins from throughout history and laid them end-to-end, they would stretch like crazy!
- I yelled, “Happy St. Patricks’s Day!” and moved closer to pinch the Walmart greeter and realized he smelled like gangrene. Close enough.
- My wife is part Irish. I have 12 Guinness and hearty stew waiting, because I love listening to her drunken rambling all fuckin’ night.
