About the size of your penis (for guys)

  1. No, there is nothing you can eat to make your penis bigger… If this were the case, it would be to the most expensive sustenance (if not substance) on the planet.
  2. No, there are no exercises that will increase your penis size… If this were the case, all men would look like Arnold Schwarzenegger in his steroid prime, but still be hung like toy poodles – just like him.
  3. No, comparing yourself to guys that swing their stump of broccoli for a living in adult movies, is never a good idea: they were handpicked for their special talents and abilities. You should compare yourself to police officers, politicians (except Bill Clinton who supposedly is hung like a walrus) and catholic priests, if you want to feel better about your penis size.
  4. Yes, there are surgical procedures that can be performed in order to improve on the size of your penis. Any plastic surgeon will be able to refer to you the right place. However, I would imagine that you would have to be pretty desperate to have a doctor with a hangover and scalpel around your little buddy… One bad S-N-I-P and you will be one E short of a whole P-E-N-I-S.
  5. Yes, the locker room can be a humbling place! But instead of wasting time trying to figure out the advanced trigonometry behind viewing angles, and optical illusions: why not just use the locker room for its intended purpose? Meaning, have a quick shower and then get the heck out of there as quickly as possible? Unless you can figure out trigonometry in your head, or be allowed to bring out your ruler: you will only bey straining your eyes, which might also result in a beating.
  6. Yes, live with it.
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