My girlfriend finally kissed me, yesterday, at work. I think my brain stopped working for a while…
Do you think she saw a dumb look on my face?
Dear Lamb Liver,
I’m sure she noticed and thought it amusing. I doubt she was insulted.
The short time span when your brain stops working is often referred to as “wtf seconds” and are perfectly normal. Here are a few examples of situations where they often occur:
- Time you spend sitting in horror before you realize that your giant plasma TV is not broken… It’s just the channel… kids have been watching scrambled porn (again).
- Moments you waste in the morning after starting your car; figuring out that the “burning engine smell” is simply the McDonald’s breakfast garbage from the week before.
- The scant few seconds required by your brain to compute and to tell your lunges and vocal chords to produce a girlish squeal after getting your penis caught in the zipper.
- Waking up period when you again find yourself naked in a car wash, covered in wax, and slowly remembering the LSD binge from the night before.
- Very silent times after sex when you are so consumed by the need to pee that you don’t remember that your partner wants to hear: “I love you!”