Advice: What is it about men and farts anyway?

Dear Beerhaze,

My husband farts a lot. He also does it everywhere without any shame. It’s embarrassing when he farts in public and makes a big deal about it. He brags… Sometimes he even brags to strangers!

I know other men fart too but bragging about it? Come on!

What is it about men and farts anyway?

Dear Nose Tingle,

Farts are in the male genes, or male jeans, if you want to look at it that way…

Men enjoy their farts because they come from deep within. Farts are a way for men to truly express themselves. It’s a way for men to bare their souls. Farts can express emotions such as joy, anger and even surprise!

Each fart is a mystery, as you will never really know what it well smell like. Two farts minutes apart can smell like rotten cabbage and rotten cabbage with a hint of lavender blooms. The sound of a fart can be that of a hissing cockroach or that of a purring or revving V8 engine. Farts can be short as firecrackers or as long and painful as 1980′s heavy metal drum solo.

Farts are variety!

Men with perfect sphincter control can fart any note on the musical scale also hold it for many a second. It’s a treat for many men to fart in a locale with good acoustics, such as a public bathroom, cave or a church. It’s just the way men are, even when farting we want to be heard and noticed.

Farts are fun! Farts are also free!

Why not share your farts and spread some joy?

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