Advice: Which public conventions are attended by the least pathetic guys?

Dear Beerhaze,

I’m gay male (23) and I know I’m a good-looking guy. I work out, eat well, dress nicely and I take care of myself. My problem is that I don’t seem to attract other gay men! Women adore me – waste of time, except as friends.

Lately, I have been going to conventions to meet guys. You know, people getting together over a common passion, then they get drunk at night and lose themselves, and they have their own hotel rooms… It work great for me to a point, and I do get laid a lot.

The problem is that I do best at Star Trek, comic book and Apple conventions. It’s better than nothing, I guess, but the problem is that most guys (“straight” and gay) are too clingy afterwards. The whole one-night stand thing seems to be a foreign concept to most of them.

  • It’s not cool trying to bed Worf when you have two Datas and eight Spocks cramping your style…
  • Ending up transformed into a wide-eyed slutty girl in an Indy comic is lame… The sex can be great but I can’t take all the crying and pleading for another blowjob in the morning. It’s not sexy!
  • What is with Apple (Mac) users and the need for tongue “everywhere”? It’s just weird…

Do you see what I am getting at? Okay… Which public conventions are attended by the least pathetic guys?

Dear Salmon Choker,

All public conventions are for pathetic, sad and soulless fanboys… There is no “least pathetic”.


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