Apple iPhone review (preview)

  1. Factory setting of the password to access the iPhone menu options is: iaManAPpleHOe.
  2. Default ring tone: “Nah, na, na, na, na, nah… I have an Apple iPhone… Nah…”
  3. Apple iPhones are only 12 mm. thick and when sat on, they easily break into iPod nanos and regular sub par cell phones.
  4. Baby icon in the menu options is used to automatically sell your first born to pay for the ridiculous prices that Cingular charges for their plans.
  5. Taser International supplied the stun gun feature for the iPhone to help owners fight off all the muggers that will be coming after them.
  6. Built-in screensaver shows Apple CEO Steve Jobs giving the finger to Nokia, Sony-Ericsson and Motorola.
  7. Unfortunately, the Apple iPhones are only shipped with iTunes and iPhones software… Granted, even a retarded hobbit can operate them – but the new SW still doesn’t give you any options to adapt them to your needs.
  8. Most important accessory for the iPhone at the release date: $29.99 rubber case, which will when placed on the phone (and inside a $49.99 leather case) almost protect it from being scratched up after the first day.
  9. Apple iPhone connectability is simply fantastic. It can easily be hooked up to anything: even to a Nintendo Wii, church Bingo cage or an easy-bake oven!
  10. Battery-life: as always, when it comes to Apple gadgets: it’s pretty much non-existent. Then again, people that will be buying this thing don’t care about usability. It’s mainly about looking cool… Until the iPhone nano comes out.The Apple iPhone gets 6.5 out of 10 Beers as a rating.
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