Benefits of wearing a fake beard

  1. Cannibals wanting to bite your face off will first try to grab onto your beard.
  2. You can wear it to socially fit in with Shriners, Masons and mother in-laws.
  3. After eating shark fin soup you can simply clean your beard in the washing machine.
  4. Put in on a leash when hitting on a hot young lady walking her Shih Tzu.
  5. Surreptitiously disguise your shaved balls when in a locker room with your buddies.
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