Embarrassing accidents that I try to avoid having

  1. Slipping and hitting my head poolside, when feeling up a walrus in heat.
  2. Burning the tip of my penis in a chicken fajita wrap.
  3. Getting my arm stuck inside a lama, mountain goat or a Buddhist monk.
  4. Rolling naked off of a church roof – on to a unicorn.
  5. Tripping and falling downstairs while wearing my wife’s Wonder woman outfit.
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