Important things I have been pondering today

  1. I wonder what Pizza Hut is like in Beijing: do they really twirl plates on sticks?
  2. Why is it that big birds only crap on my car, especially after it’s just been washed?
  3. Is it really true that no one can see you flip boogers in the dark?
  4. Does a minivan feel larger when it clips you at the kneecaps at 90 mph?
  5. What is more painful than sitting down on the couch to watch TV and find out where your daughter hid her steak knife?
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