Missing Golden Globe awards

  1. Best acting in a role featuring a mentally challenged individual, drunk disillusioned detective or the abused wife of a sadistic maniac.
  2. Best actor in a role originally turned down by Will Smith, Leonardo DiCaprio, Cuba Gooding Jr., Tom Cruise and Harrison Ford.
  3. Best actress in a role featuring excessive cleavage, skintight outfits or ¼ frontal nudity – shot through ridiculously softening lens filters.
  4. Best portrayal of an elf, hobbit, leprechaun, mermaid, alien or an avant-garde artist.
  5. Best actor in a role that could have been done much better by Tom Hanks, one of his kids, parents or family dog.
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