- Treat your French-Canadian wife with the same level of respect as you treat your chainsaw.
- Never lick anything that looks like maple syrup unless it also smells like maple syrup.
- Don’t try to strap a 1500-pound moose to the hood of your truck unless it’s very dead.
- Only put your fingers in a beaver that won’t bite them off.
- A “case of empties” equals 24 empty bottles of beer, or one full bottle of beer.
