Painful truths

  1. The more often you play twister, the greater the likelihood that you will eventually have a diarrhea related mishap.
  2. If you drink until you get your fill, there’s still that one beer in the fridge that would have been perfect, had it actually still been there when you finally go for it.
  3. Many people who believe that they can tap dance are completely delusional.
  4. When you are going on a date where nothing should go wrong, you will either end up with a huge zit, a whole in your sock or end up holding back excessive gas.
  5. The more hair gel you put in your hair, the more it will end up raining that day.
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