Real-life baby worries

  1. Your baby’s first word was, “Beelzebub” and it was said in an ancient Aramaic dialect.
  2. Your baby’s favorite games are, levitation, human sacrifice and peck-a-poo.
  3. Your baby insists on having all meat served rare, and in big chunks (preferably with the hide and fur still attached).
  4. Your baby can’t figure out the “sorting bucket” but easily creates pentagrams out of pretty much anything.
  5. Your baby’s favorite thing to watch on TV is a President Bush speech.
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