Signs that your neighbor is a sick and filthy pervert
- Dresses up like a Walt Disney tricycle and throws him down near your kid’s playground.
- In late December he is often caught mating with everyone’s Christmas lawn ornaments.
- Neighborhood dogs go missing days on end, and when they finally come back home you can’t wipe the grin off their faces.
- Whenever there’s a celebration in town – he volunteers to be the float.
- Rings people’s doorbells and offers cookies to girl guides.
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