Taking a long-distance relationship to the next level
- Send him a scented love letter instead of an email.
- Send him an intimate piece of clothing instead of a postcard with cutely posed chimps.
- Send him a picture of yourself frying pirogues in the nude instead of an old high school one.
- Send him the DVD of that German fetish movies you starred in instead of the one where you are bass fishing in Alabama.
- Send him your severed foot for his birthday instead of a piece of your crappy poetry.
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