What not to wear to help you avoid being mauled by a Grizzly bear when camping

  1. Bacon grease stained Metallica t-shirt.
  2. Hat that you wiped yourself with after watching two moose mating.
  3. Sneakers that your neighbor’s pitbull has frequently peed on.
  4. That really cool WW II flight jacket that your grandpa died in his sleep in.
  5. Lip gloss that tastes like blueberries.
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