Why Christmas is better in Sweden than in North America

  1. Sweden: Roasted salt-cured fresh ham with honey-mustard glaze (juicy)…
    North America: Turkey (dry even when supposedly quite juicy).
  2. Sweden: Moonshine from your grandpa’s still (dancing)…
    North America: Homemade eggnog by grandma (diarrhea).
  3. Sweden: ”Orgy on the North Pool (Part 38)” on cable (jolly)…
    North America: Repeat number 163 of “Frosty the Snowman” (depressing).
  4. Sweden: Santa personally delivers the gifts on Christmas Eve (Santa loves Swedes)…
    North America: Parents place gifts under the tree from Wal-Mart on Christmas Eve (Santa is not real).
  5. Sweden: Naked Twister at Christmas parties (thanks to some grandpa’s still)…
    North America: kissing under the mistletoe (thanks to some grandma’s homemade eggnog).
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