Why I would make for a lousy prositutue

  1. I won’s sleep anywhere without my own pillow and Elmo hand puppet.
  2. I hate greasy Bearnaise sauce stains on my clothes.
  3. My pale hairy arse would look hopeless in a black liquorice thong.
  4. I despise musty urine smelling truck stop urinals that play country music.
  5. My facial hair can’t be trimmed in to a nice eaven vagina-like goatee.
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