Why NASA should try to put a man on Mars

  1. There are red rocks there, which are more interesting than plain gray Moon rocks.
  2. Finally show the nut balls that Martians would never bite an astronaut’s head off and suck marrow from his or her neck, when they can do it discreetly, through the spine.
  3. They are running out of space shuttles – better send one off before the last one breaks apart and crashes in to innocent taxpayers.
  4. Amazing fringe inventions from the mission: super absorbent diapers and 500-gallon spittoons.
  5. Because a woman saying: “That’s one small step for (a) woman, one giant leap for womankind” just doesn’t sound right.
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