Why UPS is better than FedEx
- UPS people prefer talking to you instead of talking to a volleyball.
- UPS people will never spend hours rubbing two sticks together in an attempt to make fire when there is real work to be done.
- UPS people have friendlier smiles as they don’t have to knock out their own teeth with skate blades.
- UPS people are more productive because they have cafeterias and don’t need to catch their own lunch with sharpened sticks.
- UPS people are never in a bad mood because they never have sand in the crack of their arse.
- UPS people don’t develop speech impediments when their beards grow.
- UPS people don’t need to place a noose on a rag doll and dump it off a cliff to see if the rope will hold the weight… When something is processed by UPS and is slightly too heavy: they will get it done anyway.
- UPS people would never open customer’s packages to look for raft building materials in order to get off a deserted island when there are plenty of coconuts to build an airplane out of.
- UPS people never yell, “Wilson!” or “Will soon!” – they get it done right away.
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